I recently had a conversation with someone who had left the corporate world but had decided to get back in. She was asking me if I had missed “it”. When I inquired further, I began to understand the “it” she was referring to. The addictive “it” was the busyness and passed down sense of purpose and identity that is the gift of going to work for a big corporation.
She said she had missed not being busy, having a place to go every day, having her day planned out already, etc. I had to agree that I missed some of “it” too. And yet, I don’t think I could go back to living like that.
During our conversation she explained that as stressful as it was, it was easier in so many other ways. And I started to see the parallels between what she was saying and busyness in general. I admit not everyone feels that way about going to work, but ask anyone who hasn’t had to do it for a while, after the pay check, the part they miss the most is the “it” I have described below.
Here is the “it” as I see it. I have summarized it as my top ten reasons why people stay busy.
1. They feel important when they have things to do
2. They are addicted to being busy
3. It is accepted and encouraged that being busy is a good thing (cultural norm)
4. It helps them feel like they are doing something and are needed
5. It doesn’t give them time to think about what really matters
6. It keeps them from getting bored
7. It provides an excuse for everything they are not doing
8. It makes the day go by faster
9. It helps keep insanity, drama, and stress alive and in control
10. It numbs the pain of whatever might have caused some pain in their life
I could go on and on, but I am blessed not to be busy in that way anymore.
Questions to ponder:
1) Do you like being busy? If so, what is the best thing about it?
2) Can you remember a time when you were completely satisfied and fulfilled and were not busy? What were you doing?
3) What kind of busy do you like and enjoy?
Maybe you don’t have any idea what you need and are torn by the idea that being busy might not have served you well, even though you thought it was the way to be. If you’d like to explore spiritual life coaching and how it might help you re-assess where you are and how you’d like to live, do not hesitate to contact me.